Detroit fishwrap comment of the day: Super Bowl edition

Today's COTD is from the Little Fella's column in the Freep. His ode to the Giants winning the Super Bowl brings the Freep's commenting wingnuts out in force.

The following pithy thought from kj1975 is one of the few that didn't have any of the over the top hate the Patriots tend to bring out in most internet types...

Impossible? Try predictable, because that is what is was. Cheaters never win.

I think kj1975 forgot about the Patriots' 3 previous Super Bowl wins. Cheaters do win, at least 3 out of 4 times.

Tell you the truth, the main reason I picked the comment from a Super Bowl column was to give me an excuse to post my random and scattered thoughts about our unofficial national holiday.

1. Tom Petty rocked, despite what what the majority of the blogosphere claimed. Then again, I'm biased, owning damn near everything Tom Petty has ever recorded. I'm also of a vastly different music generation, being older than your typical snot-nosed 20-something sports blogger. Your typical sports blogger wouldn't know good music if 50 Cent hit them over the head with a double LP, Nickelback wrote a song about it, then Britney Spears starred in the movie version.

You know why the NFL tends to use "older" acts? It's not just because of the lack of controversy and wardrobe malfunctions. It's also due to the fact the NFL is run by older white men who love bands like Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers. Hell, I thought Prince was great year, despite the general panning he received from the bloggers.

Say what you will about the NFL's lack of hipness, I have no problem with their taste in music. As Homer Simpson once said, "Everyone knows rock n' roll attained perfection in 1974; It's a scientific fact." From Homer's mouth to God's ears...

Now you kid bloggers get the HELL off my lawn!

2. As for the advertising, it was mostly disappointing. I will admit that the talking baby saying he underrated the creepiness of clowns, and the screaming animals, along with the Alice Cooper sighting, in the Bridgestone tire ads got laughs out of me. So did Charles Barkley annoying the living Hell out of Dwayne Wade in the T-Mobile ad. (Barkley is solid gold in anything he does, he can do no wrong. "HD stands for high definition." HA!) The Chester Pitts commercial for the NFL gets extra points for the acting and oboe skills of Pitts. As for Justin Tinberlake getting clobbered over the head? Can't see enough that...

The Adam Sandler trailer made me NOT want to see the movie. (Is he blatantly ripping off "Borat?") The beer ads were disappointing, to say the very least, though Will Ferrell in his Jackie Moon ABA character did give me a few giggles. The strange Naomi Campbell ad with the dancing lizards left me saying "What. The. Fuck? " The rest (Giant rats, nodding heads, Godfather rip offs and so on) left me feeling meh.

3. Late in the pregame show, FOX had current and former NFL stars reciting the Declaration of Independence. Uh, just one question. WHY? OK, one more. What the fuck does one of the greatest and influential documents ever written have to do with an overrated and over-hyped football game?

4. Watching Bill Belichick leave the field before the end of the game didn't really mean all that much, but it did confirm that he's one of the biggest douchebags on planet earth. Losing a perfect season couldn't have happened to a bigger prick.

5. I wonder what all the New York fans and media that all but hung Eli Manning in effigy are thinking now? Not that he'll ever get an apology. I'll guarantee it now, the first bad game he has during the 2008 season, they'll be all over his ass.

6. A Boston team lost! It was nice to see Boston's overbearing and obnoxious fanbase have their balloon burst. Next to go down will be the Celtics...

7. The Eli Manning to David Tyree pitch and catch may have been the best play ever made in such an important, pressure filled title game. I really thought Manning was going down, then I figured his throw had PICK written all over it. That Tyree even got his hands on it was impressive enough, but to hold on to the ball?! Come on, you never see a play like that in Madden, let alone in the Super Bowl...

8. Tom Brady hasn't been hit that hard, or that often since...Actually, I've never seen Brady take such a fierce beating in all his years with the Patriots, or for that matter, with the Wolverines. The Giants defensive line was the true Super Bowl MVP.

9. Think Belichick is being second guessed for going for it on 4th and 13, from the Giants 31, in the 3rd quarter? That would have been a very makable 48 yard field goal attempt. Not a chip shot by any means, but definitely within the range of any NFL kicker. He should be grilled by the Boston media and fans for showing such hubris in his play calling. Those 3 points sure could have come in handy...

10. Remember how asinine Jon Kitna sounded in claiming the Lions were a better team than the Giants, despite losing 16-10? His bitching sounds even more asinine now.

11. What's the absolute worst thing to come from this Super Bowl? That Mercury Morris, Don Shula, and the rest of the 1972 Dolphins didn't become irrelevant.

DAMN, DAMN, DAMN!

Wonderful, just fucking wonderful. Exactly what the rest of our great nation didn't want or need to see. A Giants vs. Patriots Super Bowl. New York vs. Boston. Brady vs. Manning the younger. One annoyingly elitist fanbase vs. an even more annoyingly elitist fanbase.

2 weeks of the media wanking off Brett Favre would be easier to tolerate that what we are about to endure.

The moment Lawrence Tynes' field goal sailed over the crossbar, the east coast mainstream media mafia got a raging hard on. A John Holmes on Viagra sized hard on. We will now descend into a Hell on earth, 2 long, LONG, LONG weeks of New York and Boston overload.

You just had to make the God damn kick, you son of a bitch!

Thanks for nothing, Tynes... Fuck you, fuck me, fuck us. All of us fans in the flyover states, whom live in areas that the pompous bastards in the MSM believe don't matter. Fuck us hard, deep. and painfully.

Just kill me now.

Why I hate Peyton Manning, and other championship Sunday musings

Is it just me, or was I the only person who found himself rooting for the Patriots last night? It was a great game, and Indy deserves all the credit in the world for coming back to win against such a battle tested team as the Pats. But I was disappointed in the result. Yes, I was disappointed that the big market Patriots, the 00's team of the decade, lost.

To be honest, when it comes to my feelings in regard to the Indianapolis Colts and the Patriots, it's 6 of 1, half dozen of the other. In other words, as a Lions fan, I can't help but be insanely jealous of the success of both franchises.

As for why I ended up rooting the way I did, most of it came down to Tom Brady and his Michigan Wolverines ties. That's even though he has become the iconic "Tom Terriffic," the man whose picture Bill Simmons rubs one out to every night and twice on Sunday.

Despite his massive success, Brady still comes off as regular Joe, or about as regular as a multi-millionaire, good looking, model dating, SNL hosting, Super Bowl winning QB can be. But Bill Belichick, on the other hand... Even though I'll admit that's he's a great coach, he's about as likable as Dick Cheney, with an even pricklier personality, and a much worse wardrobe. Let alone the disgusting fact that Belichick is an adulterer who helped break up a marriage, which in my mind makes him an absolute douchebag.

As for the Colts, Tony Dungy seems like a nice guy who has persevered through some tough times, both personally and professionally. He's a damn good coach, more than a bit holier than thou (I'm not a fan of those who "Thank God" after a win), but without the hubris of a Belichick. Peyton Manning, on the other hand... He's a willing victim of media overexposure, or as the GF told me last night, "Manning's a commercial whore! He endorses everything!"


I'm not sure I can take 2 more weeks of Manning being fluffed by the media, and you know it's going to happen. On top of the MSM man-love for Manning, we will continually be pummeled over the head with Mannning's ads for Gatorade, DirecTv,and that damn MasterCard ad with the,"They're not booing, they're saying "MOOOOVERS!" line. Enough already of that gomer with the fivehead hawking crap on my television, please.

So the thought of having to endure everything that is Peyton Manning overload, which has already begun, by the way, was the tipping point. The obnoxious ubiquitousness of Manning overtly pimping everything under the sun overrode my utter contempt for Belichick.

I'm warning you now, by the time the Super Bowl finally kicks off, you are not going to want to hear the 2 words "Peyton Manning" ever again. EVER again.

As for the NFC game, I'm still attempting to wrap my mind around the fact that a Bears team with Rex Grossman under center is going to the Super Bowl. Rex Grossman? Grossman makes Jon Kitna look like Tom Brady!

So a one dimensional team, the Chicago Bears, won the NFC. The Bears are a throwback team. Well, more like a backwards lateral team, as you only have to go back to the 2000 Baltimore Ravens. Win with defense, and don't F yourself over on offense. Unfortunately for the Lions, they can't win with defense, and do F themselves over on offense.

The Bears are direct competitors with the Motor City Kitties. They somehow went all the way to the Super Bowl, and did so with an extremely flawed team. Which, as a Lions fan, brings a question to mind. Could the Lions build a team with a defense so dominating, they win despite having a below average (Or worse) offense? (Or for that matter, vice versa, win with a Martz era Rams style offense and average defense?) Could the Lions EVER put together a run similar to the Bears'?

No. Never. Can't happen. Don't make me laugh. Are you insane?!

That's how far away our Detroit Lions are from being a contender. We fans can't even envision a scenario where they are in contention.

A You Tube find: A delusinal Lions fan take on Patriots vs. Lions

You Tube is a wonderful place. Just search any combination of Scrubs + Turk + Poison for an example of its greatness. But...You Tube can also be a very scary and dark place. The following video is an example of such.

TWFE presnts a You Tube find, produced by what has to be the biggest Detroit Lions fan on the planet, a character named Kitna2Furrey. The name alone scares me. What's even scarier is his prediction for this weekends Lions - Pats game. Mr. Kitna2Furrey predicts a shutout. Not for the Patriots, but the for the Lions?

You have been warned, watch at you own risk...

First, before you press play, I have to give one disclaimer. THIS IS NOT ME!