Monday, September 08, 2008

Detroit Lions @ Atlanta Falcons: Final thoughts - We were sold a bill of goods

As usual, here's the links to my live blogging gradual descent into profane lunacy.

1st quarter: Do you believe in...gag...now?


2nd quarter: Just kill me now. Put me out of my misery

3rd quarter: A new hope? No such luck

4th quarter: SCREW THE LIONS!

1. The quotes I read after Detroit's latest debacle (and it was a HUGE debacle) infuriate me. Per the Killer...

Cory Redding: "This is a huge wakeup call for us,"

You needed a wake up call? FOR THE FIRST GODDAMN GAME OF THE SEASON? Give me a fucking break, you overpaid, one season wonder!


Dwight Smith: "We need to get back to Detroit and work on our tackling."

No shit. Seriously, no fucking shit, you asshat! You would've thought the Lions were playing by two-hand touch football rules. No wonder Tampa was more than happy to let you walk!

Jon Kitna The God Warrior: "You have to maintain a bigger picture. You can't allow yourself to get into the mindset of 'It's the same ol' thing."

But it is THE SAME OL' THING! I know, know. The Lions are only 0-1. It's a long season. Bullshit! I've seen the "same ol' thing" for DECADES! And it never, ever changes! Bigger picture my ass! I could give a shit about the "big picture." I only see one picture, and it sucks!

And Rod Marinelli is so full of shit, he floats:

"It's tackling. Anybody can see that. The fits were OK, but we've got to wrap up. And we've got to get more hats on the ball."

Tackling? It was the TACKLING? Fucking, DUH! Even the functionally retarded Rob Parker could have figured that out, genius. I'm glad the head coach has realized the Lions' biggest issue was the shitty TACKLING! Let's also not forget you're the same assclown who hand picked this group, a group who didn't realize you're allowed to actually tackle the guy with the God damn ball!

But the greatest hits cliches keep coming from Mr. Pound The Rock.

It's the first game of the year and you don't like it, but you go back to work."

Back to work? Jesus fucking Christ, Marinelli says that after every God damn motherfucking loss! After 2 seasons of this bullshit, it's become a broken record. "Pound the rock." "Look at the film." "Go to work." Might as well say, "The bar is high," as Marinelli has accomplished just as much as the first moron Millen hired as head coach. Absolutely nothing.

He even uses the tired "work" quote a second time...

"I'm very determined to get these guys back. It's one game, the first game, and we don't like it, not at all. But we'll go back and go to work."

Go to Hell.

2. Marinelli kept 11 defensive lineman on the 53 man roster coming out of camp, when most teams keep 8, 9 at most. They were just too good to cut, right? They were the supposed strength of the team, the heart of the defense. So they should have dominated today, correct? Uh, not so much.

8 of the linemen were active, with rookies Andre Fluellen and Landon Cohen, along with Ikaika Alma-Francis deactivated. (By the way, can we call Alma-Francis a massive bust now?) The leading tacklers on the D-line, Jared DeVries and Cory Redding, had all of 3 tackles. Count 'em. 1-2-3. These guys should be making plays, not getting played. (No, I'm not going to bitch about the Shaun Rogers trade, as he needed to go. So be it)

The combined stats from the D-line were...well, here's the ugly numbers.

11 tackles, 1 sack.

Even worse, the D-line could not put any pressure on a rookie QB, who was protected by a makeshift O-line. They couldn't get within spitting distance of Matt Ryan most of the afternoon, allowing him to make all the evening highlight shows as only the 8th rookie QB to win his first start. God forbid, let's not even go into the Falcons' 300+ rushing yards. The Atlanta backs, Turner and Norwood, has holes big enough to drive a Hummer through. Disgusting.

Wasn't one of the biggest selling points in Marinelli being brought to Detroit was due to his being some sort of defensive savant, a guru who had the magic touch when it came to turning pedestrian defensive linemen into All-Pro monsters? 

We were sold a bill of goods. 

If this continues, I'm adding "EPIC" to Marinelli's side

3. Marinelli's game management was, as it has been throughout his Lions tenure, sorely lacking.

The Lions had used up all their 1st half time outs halfway though the 2nd quarter. Kitna was berating any and every coach within earshot during the 1st half confusion. There were substitution issues, along with confusion on the sidelines. Special teams were putrid. There was no sense of urgency, even though they were down 2 scores late in the game.

From all appearances, Marinelli is in over his head. The same problems we saw during year 1 with Marinelli, we still see today.

The 2008 Lions are supposed to be Rod Marinelli's team, with his handpicked players, having purged what was left of Millen's and Mike Martz's pets. His fingerprints were on all of the draft picks, and the Lions signed a shitload of Tampa free agents because Marinelli had to have them. And this was the result. An embarrassment. The Lions still lack talent. The only '08 draft pick to get ANY significant playing time was Smith. No one else from the draft contributed.

That says volumes about Marinelli's talent evaluation skills.

I'm done giving the Lions' head coach the benefit of the doubt. For over 2 seasons, Marinelli has talked a good game, but has not backed it up one iota. After a performance as bad as this, Marinelli should be held accountable. In my book, he's on very thin ice.

4. There were some good things to come out of  today's loss. Kevin Smith looks like a keeper. Calvin Johnson had the most productive game of his career. There's only 15 games left in the season. That's about it. But it's something, right? Right?

Shit.
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7 comments:

  1. Ugh, Glad I was out at the cabin. Removed any desire to try and find somewhere to watch the game. I told my friends that I was excited for the conclusion of the NFL season, because, as a Lions fan, things are usually over by week 3.

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  2. Your right - Marinelli has not improved this team at all. Free agent signings and draft picks have all sucked or backfired altogether. I too am sick and tired of his broken-record approach. He's saying the same things about the same players/positions as he was 2 years ago. Pitiful.

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  3. Well, in retrospect I'm glad they showed the Tampa-NO game here in Milwaukee rather than the team-that-shall-remain-nameless. I was able to marvel at the QB stylings of Jeff Garcia! For awhile at least. Saw the score updates from time to time, 14-0...21-0...ad nauseum. I sighed, turned everything off, and went back outside to finish painting the house.

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  4. Positives...Granderson had three hits (three more than most of the lineman), I went to watch sheep dog trials over the weekend and saw athletes who worked hard every second they were out there (the sheep dogs)while grappling with feral sheep an average of six times their size, the Tigers won two out of three, Dick Rod won his first game and now gets to go to South Bend to square off with Chubby Charlie, the Spartans drubbed an MAC team, a feat beyond the talents of Pitt, OSU, and UM, the Pistons camp opens soon, and the Red Wings look ready to hold on to the Cup for another year. The Lyin' Lions? Let's see, The Wayne Fontes Era was the Golden Age of Lions football and December 3 is the 58th anniversary of the day Cloyce Box had 307 receiving yards in one game.

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  5. Juskimo, I'm glad you were enjoying life, rather than having your soul sucked dry by the Lions' ineptitude.

    Anon, amen. I just heard Marinelli's presser, and it was just more of the same bullshit. Broken record, indeed.

    Paavo, kudos to you for getting something useful accomplished. All I did with my Sunday was bitch and moan about the Lions.

    Omar, as always, you are on the money. I'm going to have to touch on the Wolverines sometime this week. Where's Cloyce Box when you need him?

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  6. Watching paint dry was probably less stressful. And quite possibly more entertaining.

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  7. Just wait till next century....

    Ummm. I mean, "year". Just wait till next year.

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