Sunday, October 28, 2007

Bright hunter orange is not a flattering color: 1st quarter Lions - Bears thoughts

All sort of questions are swirling around today's Lions - Bears grudge match.

Are the Lions for real? Will Detroit get blown out on the road again? Will the Bears punish the Lions in retaliation for embarrassing them in their first meeting? Which team is the true playoff contender? And most importantly, who in the Hell thought the Bears' ugly ass orange alternate unis were a good idea? They look like God damn pumpkins...

Sam Rosen and Tim Ryan are live from Soldier Field, while I'm semi-lucid from TWFE HQ.

But first, FOX says we have to visit London, and the "Super Bowl atmosphere" (HA! Please...), for the US and British national anthems. Whatever... Does anyone seriously think the NFL will ever catch on overseas? I'm going to avoid making the obvious soccer joke.

Finally, it's game time. Will the Lions kick to Devin Hester? It's a pooch kick, but Hester gets the ball anyway. Rosen goes apeshit with excitement, as Hester scrambles his way to the 38. Jesus Christ, he's scary!

And what do you know, the Lions force a 3 and out! Will wonders never cease! The D neither bent, nor broke. The Lions will start at their own 10 after the punt.

On 1st down, Jon Kitna looks for Calvin Johnson DEEP down the right sideline! It's broken up, but at least they put the threat of CJ out there. 2 Kevin Jones touches give the Lions a 1st down. Offense is looking good so far. I spoke too soon, Kitna nearly gets picked as he badly overthrows Roy Williams.

Jones off tackle for 1 yard sets up a 3rd and 9 from their own 33. Kitna finds Troy Walters...1/2 yard short of the 1st down. Is it that hard to run the pattern to the Goddamn sticks? I guess so.

Lions will punt, hopefully put of bounds, and away from Hester. Which Nick Harris does, thank you very much. Bears take over at the 35.

2 short Benson runs sets up a 3rd and 4. For some reason Rosen sings the praises of Benson.

SHIT! Big Baby is shown on the sidelines, and he's in a great deal of pain! SHITSHITSHIT!

A Lion offsides, and 2 Benson runs, get the Bears across midfield. Rogers' arm is being heavily taped, let's hope he can play through the pain. While I was busy panicking, Griese hits Berrian at the Lion 32.

FUMBLE! But Benson gets back his own drop. It's now a big 3rd and 3, which Griese gets easily on an out to Mushy Mohhamed. Benson is stacked up on 1st down, and the injured Rogers sacks Griese on 2nd! Yes, Big Baby!

3rd and 18, and the Bears chicken out on throwing deep, and fool no one with a TE screen, which gets only 4 yards.

It's a 40 yard figgie attempt for the Bears...Gold's kick is....WIDE LEFT! Lions dodge an early bullet!

A Jones draw that fools no one, and sack of Kitna, leaves the Lions 3rd and 15. Kitna rolls right, has lots of time....Looks for Williams DEEP...Where's the flag, Roy was mugged! Yes, there's the yellow! 47 yard interference call against the team wearing safety orange!

Kitna drills a pass to the wide open Mike Furrey, a 23 yard gain to the Bears 5! AHHH, Jones wide right loses 2 yards. The Bears were all over it. DAMN IT! Kitna holds the ball too long, when he finally tucks it away, he's a second too late doing so, and is sacked at the 13! SHIT! Get rid of the damn ball!

A short pass to McDonald at the 7 brings back bad memories of your typical Joey Blue Skies dump off on 3rd down, and leaves Jason Hanson with a chip shot field goal attempt. Which will have to wait...

That's the 1st quarter folks. It ends 0-0, with the Lions on the verge of getting 3.


  1. Think the Lions will ever get a decent announcing team from Fox? That first pass to CJ, the announcers were going on about the "great coverage". To me, it looked like a slight miscue- the pass was short of CJ, like either he went too far, or Kitna underthrew it.

  2. I'm so used to the Leo's getting the FOX dregs, save for Turkey day of course, I don't really care anymore. If anything, it adds to the experience, listening to the FOX 5th string broadcast team stumble thru a broadcast.

  3. Generally agree that the announcers can be ignored. But still.... I think Backus sucks, but I'm not sure about blaming him for Griese getting hit, as they did once. Not to mention Mohammed and Olson catching the same pass for a TD.

    But with them legitimately (for now) in the playoff hunt, they should get better announcers. I hope.