Questions, we have questions...

I have a few questions for everyone, so please pay attention.

OK, I'd like to see who actually watched the NHL All-Star game last night? Be honest... A quick show of hands, please? Anyone? Anyone? Beuller? Thought so.

Another question. Anyone impressed with Tommy Amaker's leading the Michigan Wolverines cagers to a 16-5 record? No one? Just as I thought.

Has anyone seen any of Amaker's players improve over their career, even in the slightest? That's a gimmie...

Since the Wolverines aren't able to beat even the semblance of a good team, last night's whooping by the Badgers being the latest example of ineptitude, does Michigan have anything more than a slim chance to make the make the NCAA tournament? OK, enough with the laughing, I'm not joking! This is a serious question that needs an answer. No one thinks different? Hell, I expected as much.

Mike Furrey signed a 3 year deal with the Detroit Lions yesterday. Will keeping Furrey be the difference in the Lions avoiding another double digit loss season? Awful quiet out there! Hello?

Does Matt Millen have even the slightest clue? HA! Hey, I had to throw an easy one in there. If anyone thinks otherwise, I'll petition for their being committed.

Drew Sharp advocates that the Red Wings should try to acquire a nearly washed up and always injured Peter Forsberg from the Flyers. To me, this looks like another case of a columnist writing about a sport he knows nothing about, thinking that since Forsberg is a big name, trading for him must be a good idea. Do you disagree? Anybody? Wow, 5 for 5 so far.

Even though Peyton Manning is in the Super Bowl, you'd still rather be Tom Brady. The Tom Brady with his 3 Super Bowl rings, and dating models, than the fiveheaded commercial whoring Manning who's continually hanging around, not Victoria's Secret models, but Kenny Chesney, right? If you think different, speak up! It got awful quiet in these parts...

We all hope that Rob Parker passed the "Audition," and will he hired by the Worldwide Leader to take Woody Paige's place on Cold Pizza. No sane person thinks differently, right? Right? Whew, I'm glad we're on the same page! I have to admit, that scenario is in my prayers every night. I'm guessing the odds are damn good, as I'm sure that the Worldwide Leader is required to hire the functionally retarded. That has to be the only explanation as to why Matt Millen is still employed.

Is the Worldwide Leader's Sean Salisbury anything more than a clueless, bigoted, woman harassing ex jock blowhard with a feeling of entitlement who must have something on his bosses that allows him to continue to spew inanities on the airwaves? That's an easy one, no need to explain. He's nothing more than that...

Can anyone explain why in the Hell Salisbury is still employed by the Worldwide Leader? Or for that matter, what they saw in him in the first place? I don't have the answers either. Some things will never be answered.