Touring the internets...

Beefshower gives the Tigers his midseason grades. It's a fine post, but even more interesting, we find out more about his very shady past. Committing felonies against innocent mailboxes, becoming infected with the measles, extreme video game addictions, his alias of Viceroy Fizzlebottom, and in general, being a disreputeable layabout slacker. Sounds like my kind of guy! (Save for the measles...)

Alexis Gomez: Thames personal pinch runner/defensive replacement has been decent doing the things he does, whatever those are. I was in attendance at the game where he hit his first and quite possibly only career homerun. However I was in the bathroom at the time so I missed it, which is like the equivalent of taking a crap as Halley's comet goes by. Grade C+.

Alexis Gomez home run = Halley's Comet. Only on teh intarwebs... Beef, you need to tell your dad to cut back on your office busy work so you can post a little more often.

Over where men sweat endeavorously, Ian goes off on Matt Millen for giving the utterly average Jeff Backus lifetime security...

Backus signed a six-year deal to stay in Detroit yesterday. So either he thought staying here was worth it, or he and his agent figured out he wouldn't get $15.5 million in guaranteed money from any other team besides the Lions.

Clearly, Matt Millen just can't get over his first - draft pick, that is.

Ian, you should know by now when it comes to Millen and his draft picks, you need realize that Millen takes the advice of Neil Sedaka to heart. Breaking up is hard to do...

At the site that stalks the immortal Johnny Grubb, Eno says the Tigers need to play .500 ball over the first 20 games after the All-Star break to prove that they aren't going anywhere.

If the Tigers can manage even a 10-10 record after this break, putting them at 69-39, I think they'll be fine. Two-thirds of the season will have been played, and they'll have reminded teams that they're not about to fold.

Strangely, James Barrie appeared to take over for a paragraph...

The Tigers frolicked in daffodils and clover for 88 games, sprinkled with some sort of pixie dust that occasionally energizes a dormant team.

All that's missing is Peter Pan asking us to clap our hands if we believe in the Tigers...

IwoCPO is back from being Ned Beatty to the Delieverance boys, and is posting again at A2Y. While touring stills in the hollar, he heard the shocking news...

Five days without any Wing news whatsoever, short of a panicked email on Wednesday to Paul at Kukla’s begging for hockey news (sent from my brother’s blackberry…what an evil device). Paul informed me that Shanahan had, indeed, signed with New York; that Belfour was by no means guaranteed to end up in Detroit, and that Holland was quoted as saying he “hopes the Wings are a playoff team.”

I threw up in my mouth a little, headed back to the cabin and continued my hockey-less vacation.

I think IwoCPO is pissed.

Two Detroit hockey icons: gone.

Your starting goalie, 39 wins: gone

And nothing, nobody, to replace them.

The Summer of Ken now officially sucks.

Y'all, he's definitely pissed...

Brian does us all a solid at The Sports Frog, by saving us the trouble of reading the latest Worldwide Leader dot com puff piece on Notre Dame, and summarizing it thusly.

OMG! CHARLIE WEIS IS AWESOME! NOTRE DAME IS AWESOME! THEY ALMOST BEAT A GOOD TEAM LAST YEAR! THEY'RE GOING TO WIN IT ALL THIS YEAR!

Brian, that sounds more like the NBC pre game to me...

Kevin is still struggling with the fact that Ben Wallace has left for the second city...

Dear Chicago,

You’ll be regretting this in two years.

Love,
Kevin

Don't worry big guy, the Pistons now have Nazr Mohammed. Ugh. I think I just threw up in my mouth...

While prepping for fantasy football, the LSG has found the the sleeper QB of your draft...Jon Kitna.

I am sure most Lions fans would love 25 touchdowns as long as the INTs are under 10 or so. Kitna could be a good fit with the Martz system, but part of me wants to see what Josh McCown could do as well. Either way I think the Lions are better off without Joey and I look for Roy Williams and Kevin Jones to have better seasons because of consistent quarterback play.

Sportspig, if you take Kitna, you're a braver man than I. That's coming from someone who has a draft in my keeper money league tomorrow. Yes, a mid July fanstasy draft. No, it's not my idea. Yes, expect a post about it.

At Roar of the Tigers, Samara is celebrating the fact that for the first time in years, the Tigers have players deserving of All-Star acolades.

THE POINT is that there were three Tigers in the All Star Game and, get this, they were all deserving. And holy crumbnutters on a crumbcake, both Bonderman and especially Verlander were thrown out as deserving names by all the wise old number-crunching blog-types. Some people were even saying our very own big-headed Plonkers should be manning second base! That’s 6 more or less deserving Tigers, at the least.

Holy crumbnutters on a crumbcake? All that's missing at the end of the sentence is...Batman! I have to ask, when did the Boy Wonder start posting on a Detroit-centric sports blog? And what in the Hell is a crumbnutter?

If you are looking for an entertaining message board to kill some time, I suggest you visit "The Hangout." If you do stop by and say hey, I have one piece of advice. Don't diss the true geekiness that is the Superman thread. I should know...