Wednesday, June 14, 2006

Todd Jones is the antichrist

Word of warning, I'm going to commence beating a dead horse. Repeatedly...

I was laying low, not planning on posting today. Unfortunately, around 10pm tonight, Todd Jones came in to pitch for the boys wearing the Olde English D. Following are my exact thoughts as Jones first enters the game, and after Jones gives up the lead.

Oh dear Lord Jesus, this ain't happening, man...This can't be happening, man! This isn't happening!

That's it man, game over man, game over! What the fuck are we gonna do now? What are we gonna do?

The jarhead in "Aliens" perfectly sums up my feelings as to Todd Jones remaining the Tigers' closer.

The Rollercoater blew up in the 12th innng tonight, giving up 4 runs to the God damn Devil Rays. The God Damn Tampa Bay Devil Rays. A team that couldn't hit their way out of a Tee-ball league. But who needs a batting tee when you have Todd Jones pitching?

FSD had the mikes up, and you could hear that the crowd was not very happy with Mr. Jones' performance. "You suck" being the most family friendly term used.

We have a bullpen situation in Detroit. The Tigers have 2 late inning pitchers that are out performing the Rollercoaster by a wide margin. A WIDE MARGIN. Todd Jones, the designated closer, he of the 12 million over 2 years, the man Jim Leyland says he still has confidence in, now has an ERA of 7.27. That's not a typo. Seven two seven.

Might as well be 666.

I have praised Jim Leyland to no end. He deserves all the credit and kudos he has been receiving, no question. But how long will his stubborn streak, and the Marlboro Man has a wide one, allow a pitcher who is better suited to pitching home run derby, to instead close out games?

What makes it worse on the fans is that we all saw Joel Zumaya literally blowing Tampa batters away. 5 K's in 2 innings, 'nuff said. Which brings up an important question. If a contending team like Boston is comfortable with rookie Jonathan Papelbon closing, why won't the Tigers powers that be make the move to either Fernando Rodney or Zumaya? They have more than proven themselves. It's a legitimate question, and one that deserves answering.

I don't want to hear that they believe he'll pitch his way out of it. He obviously hasn't been able to do so up to this point. If that is what they want the Rollercoaster to do, then have him pitch thru it in middle damn relief, not when games hang in the balance.

I know you can't win every game. The Tigers had their opportunities tonight, but couldn't capitalize on them. But the game was not over...Till Todd Jones came in.

So I have to ask the Tigers this one thing. When you have an arsonist a so-called fireman who plays with fire, rather than put them out, why do you continually allow yourself to get burned?


  1. Trade Jones And young to Pirates or Giants for a big bat like maybe Bonds or Jeromy Burnitz

  2. Considering the desperate need for a LH bat, Burnitz would be worth considering. Honestly, I'd take a bag of used baseballs for Jones at this point.